Saturday, August 4, 2012

Life's Persistent Questions

Dog goes into yard.
Dog poops.
Within one minute poop covered with flies.
WTF?  Where do they come from?

Dog on remote trail in woods.
Dog poops.
Within 30 seconds poop covered with flies.
WTF?  Do these things fly around following dogs?

On sailboat 10 miles offshore.
Cut cantaloupe.
Within 1 minute cabin filled with tiny flies.
WTF?  Do these suckers live inside cantaloupes?  Do they somehow know there's a cantaloupe on board and follow us to sea?  Do they lurk in the cabin hoping a cantaloupe will come on board?

So many questions.  Too many answers.

32 comments:

  1. You are not asking the right question. The question to ask is, "Are the flies on the cantaloupe the same flies that were on the dog poop earlier?"

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    1. No, different flies. But I think they're in cahoots.

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  2. Flies are in fact highly intelligent creatures and have super advanced but tiny technology that allows them to open wormholes in the time/space continuum, thus allowing instantaneous travel between far distant points.

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  3. perhaps God is the poop. no, wait, never mind.
    perhaps flies have a homing frequency activated by particular and pungent organic matter. all i know is, there is always always at least one buzzing around my cup when i have anything to drink outside.... coffee, tea, smoothie, booster.... and, as you have so accurately described, it comes straight out of nowhere.
    can't wait to see what comments this post attracts from the usual suspects.

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    1. I would judge from what we've witnessed from his followers over the centuries that God is indeed the poop.

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  4. My question is: Are we commenters but the flies which this particular poop has attracted?

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    1. Bingo! But the comments remain none the less.

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  5. My question is are you sure it's the dog and the boat the flies are following and not the owner of said items who just happens to bathe to regularly to be a convenient place to lay eggs?

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    1. No, not sure at all. I have been followed by swarms of mosquitoes while walking the trails. That theory could account for the bugs that bounce off of my study window late at night when I'm writing foolishness like this at the computer.

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  6. Replies
    1. That's what Rubye Jack thought. I'm kinda leaning towards Harlequin's idea that God is the poop.

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  7. Surely you know that flies are everywhere? In the ointment, on the wall, in fruit, open, ........
    They have no need to follow their targets, they just are, one of the last big unanswered puzzles we have been given to while away what could otherwise be a reasonably interesting, productive and fulfilling life.

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    1. Well, at least no one has posed why do roaches always die with their feet in the air.

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  8. Also, when you dig a huge hole in the middle of a large dry field, creating a pond, the pond will become full of frogs. Where did the frogs come from?

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    1. Just when I thought it was safe... here's another one. Where the hell do frogs come from?

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  9. Time flies like an arrow. Fruit flies like a banana.

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    1. Hey Nance. Good to see you're out and about again. Fruit flies to like bananas... and cantaloupes.

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  10. I think the poop and the cantaloupe generate the flies. It's the exposure to air that does it.

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    1. Well then, how do they get there so soon? Especially ten miles at sea? Thought this was going to be simple didn't you? :)

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  11. Spontaneous generation, i.e. flies happen. Maybe they are right behind you all the time, but no matter how fast you turn, they are faster. I think I hear something buzzing.

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    1. I think that's a strong theory. I know that when in the woods I can ofter stop and turn around to find a swarm of mosquitoes. Could be flies there amongst them and I would never notice.

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  12. Wow...I'd never thought about the existence of flies. Like you, I've contemplated the reason for &*^%$#!&% mosquitoes. I'm both place zero weight on the food chain. Of course, that was by a physicist.

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  13. Flies and paparazzi - both attracted to poop. I think this is an X-file.

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  14. Silly YOU. Didn't ya know? God made flies with their very own built in "sniff alert" GPS.

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    1. You're right about that DonnaJean. BTW, where the hell have you been?

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  15. Don't look now, but just because there are no flies on you doesn't mean there are no flies IN you.

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    1. Good grief! I could've gone all day without hearing that!

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