Tuesday, July 24, 2012

I Love My Gun

I love my gun.  She's a beauty.  A Colt .38 police special.  It's a revolver.  It doesn't jam.  I bought it about 20 years ago when some low lifes broke into the house next door.  I got hollow-point bullets.  I'm not messing around.  Anyone breaks into my house and, BAM!  Lights out muther fucker.

I love my gun.  I keep it in the night stand next to my bed.  Sometimes I take it out to look at it.  I like to look at it.  It's dangerous.   Cold blue steel.  Makes me feel strong.  "You think you're tough homey?  C'mon, I got something for you."

I love my gun.  I like to hold it.  Caress it.  Oh yeah.  Soooo smoooth.  So deadly.  When I caress it I get an erection.... 

Gun control?  Good luck with that Commie faggots.   Ha ha ha ha ha 

22 comments:

  1. Right on man fuck that gun control, everyone should be required to own three hell no four of 'em and a long gun too. Of course bullets should cost as much as an aircraft carrier each.

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    1. bullets would be like moonshine... home brew

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  2. You only have ONE gun? Around here, "gun control" means being able to hit your target. And I'm fine with that. I've always enjoyed target shooting, but I don't know if I could ever point a gun at a human being and pull the trigger. Maybe so. Years ago, when I was pregnant with our oldest, my husband was supposed to be on overnight duty at the base. At about 3 AM, I heard someone rustling around on our front porch, so I grabbed the handgun, and walked through to the living room in the dark. My husband heard me click off the safety, and yelled, "It's me, Susan!" He was very proud of me for pulling the gun out to defend myself. But that's just it. It wasn't to protect me; it was because of the baby. As proud of he was of me back then, he got that angry with me years later when I told him I was pretty sure I could shoot another person to protect someone else, but I didn't think I could do it just to save myself. And I'm still not sure. Let's hope I never have to find out.

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    1. I'm with you Susan. I could pull the trigger in self defense I'm sure, but I sure as hell hope I never have to. If I was king and could eliminate guns tomorrow it would be done. But I ain't and it is what it is.

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  3. Are you planning to buy an assault rifle?

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    1. A sawed-off shot gun. One of those with the shorty handle. Load it with 00 buck and slugs.

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    2. I'd still take an assault rifle over a shotgun... you can't over-estimate the power of being able to shoot through walls and most vests.

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    3. The first priority is to hit the target. That's why all assault teams use shotguns.

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    4. Lol, you can't buy a pre-sawed-off shotgun, unless you bought it from someone who sawed it off. or you are not planning on buying it from a store. Get an education!

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  4. Ah, the joy of heavy metal.
    It does seem the simplicity of the 50's is no longer and Ms. Advocate Gun Control here has been thinking about getting her own very soon. Maybe.

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    1. I hear you Ruby. Of course this is all tongue in cheek but the cat's out of the bag on gun control.

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  5. Too funny. Reminds me of that TV show "Sledge Hammer." In one episode, the cop is lying in bed, all dreamy and blissful looking, talking all lovey-dovey like. Then the camera moves further away for a wider view, and his gun is lying on the other pillow.

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    1. Your reminded me of the Beatle's song, Happiness is a Warm Gun. In fact, if I can find a video I'll add it to the post.

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  6. I have no problem with people owning a handgun or rifle or even a shotgun even though I don't own one myself. I've enjoyed target practice with a rifle and my dad would take us to the beach to shoot skeet and that was fun but automatic weapons should be banned. No citizen needs an automatic weapon. And to tell you the truth, I'm more afraid of the armed citizen than I am the burglar.

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    1. Ditto. You probably have much more to fear from some road rage idiot than a burglar.

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  7. I have yet to find a gun that loves me. Or anyone, for that matter.

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  8. It's far too late to dream of any kind of control. There are millions of them and they are easy to buy, borrow, or steal, legally or illegally, it doesn't matter. 300 Americans are shot to death every day. It is apparently who and what we are. Pandora's box was opened long ago.

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    1. So true. I hadn't heard the 300 a day figure before. Disgusting.

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    2. You haven't heard 300 before because about 80 people are killed everyday by gun violence. And about a third of those are police or accidental incidents. another 150 are injured everyday. Which puts gun violence in general at less then 300 a day in a nation that has over 3million people.

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    3. I can provide links to that information if you would like. Can Jono do the same?

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  9. not much more need be said. this is quite effective communication-- you let the details carry the load. and it's quite a load.

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