Saturday, October 1, 2011

The Path To Success


What is 100%

MORE than 100%? Ever wonder about those people who say they are giving more than 100%? We have all been to those meetings where someone wants you to give over 100%. How about achieving 103%? What makes up 100% in life?

Here's a little mathematical formula that might help you answer these questions:

If:
 
A B C D E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z

is represented as:
1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26.

Then:
H-A -R -D-W-O -R -K
8+1+18+4+23+15+18+11 = 98%

and
 

K -N -O -W-L -E-D-G-E
11+14+15+23+12+5+4+7+5
= 96%

But ,


A-T -T -I -T -U -D-E
1+20+20+9+20+21+4+5 = 100%

And,

B -U -L -L -S -H-I -T
2+21+12+12+19+8+9+20 = 103%

AND, look how far ass kissing will take you.

A-S -S -K -I -S-S -I -N-G
1+19+19+11+9+19+19+9+14+7 = 118%
 
So, one can conclude with mathematical certainty, that While Hard work and Knowledge will get you close, and Attitude will get you there, it’s Bullshit and Ass kissing that will put you over the top.

14 comments:

  1. and F U C K Y O U = 102%
    It's worth the extra effort.

    ReplyDelete
  2. And SMARTASS = 105% Looks like you're over the top JJ.

    ReplyDelete
  3. A good one that has been proven true.

    ReplyDelete
  4. Ponder this:

    111%: In 2009, the percentage increase of young people in France who had unsafe sex, according to a recent survey.

    (Wish I could have thought of something funnier, don't you?)

    ReplyDelete
  5. ZZ Top = 103% that lil’ old band from Texas. Good enough for me.

    The Beatles =64% would you still need me, would you still feed me when I’m 64?

    ReplyDelete
  6. Sorry you took that as being directed to you, C. It wasn't. So how about this one: SELF-CENTERED = 116%

    ReplyDelete
  7. Have no idea where you are going with this Punch, but I like.

    ReplyDelete
  8. LOL!!!!

    A few of my coworkers know the ass kissing thing well.

    ReplyDelete
  9. By jove Squirrel, maybe gathering nuts all these years has paid off.

    ReplyDelete

Sorry about the comment thingy folks. Too much spam.