AT&T Sucks!

AT&T.  The American Telegraph and Telephone company.  An American icon.  A government supported monopoly.  As clear a case of an over-bloated, incompetent, bureaucratic, don't give a damn corporation as there is.

Some may be too young to remember when AT&T was the standard of the world.  The best service, the best customer service, at the best price of any other communications corporation on earth.  True, you have to be pretty old to remember that, but it was true.

Some of you may be too young to remember when there were hundreds of telephone companies spread throughout the land.  In the years following WWII, Eisenhower pushed to secure the U.S. by developing the interstate highway system and by consolidating communications systems to assure rapid and dependable communications nationwide.  Thus did AT&T and the "Baby Bells", the Bell Telephone Companies, gain government support for taking over every small town mom & pop telephone company in the country.

And here, 50 years later, is the result.

In an effort to consolidate my personal communications systems and possibly save a little money, I contacted AT&T (my land-line and internet server) about their new U-Verse bundle.  Here's what happened:

1. Tech comes out to the house to see if I can get Uverse and determines I can.  (My brother, three doors down has it, but I'm on the fringe, about 300' away)
2. We set up the appointed day for the big switch.
3. Tech arrives and disconnects my land-line and DSL.
4. After several hours of work, tech can't get Uverse to work.  Calls in diagnostics team, meantime... no land-line phone or DSL for me.
5. Two days later diagnostic team determines signal not strong enough for me to get Uverse.  Still no land-line or DSL.  (My wife and I have a home office and depend on email and fax, neither of which now exist.  We run our business out of Panera Bread Co's. wi-fi)
6. Can't get old phone or DSL turned back on because work order in progress.
7. 4 days and dozens of calls later ATT decides we have to start over as new customers.  We lose the phone number we've had for 15 years, the one all of our business associates use.
8. 6 days later we re-establish phone and DSL service with new number.  Which means we have to contact all of our contacts to change contact information.
9. No apology, no nothing from ATT, but since we're "new" customers we get DSL at a discount for 6 months.

Would have dumped the whole thing and gone to Comcast which is our TV provider except that we lose the Comcast signal every time it rains, or if I hold my mouth wrong.  Need phone and internet more dependable than that (again, home office).  Can't use satellite as too many big trees in the way.  Direct-tv suggested we cut one down, a 100-yr old Live Oak.  Right. 

Next:

Time for me to renew my cellular service - AT&T.  Want a free or cheap upgrade as the phone I've got from the last time, an LG something-or-other "smart phone" is a piece of crap.  Here's how it goes:

1. Online looking at upgrade options when chat window opens, "How may I help you today?"
2. Me, I want a non-smart phone that will give me basic phone service but I want it to synchronize my MS Outlook calendar and contacts with phone and computer.  I don't need nor want any texting/internet/gps packages.  Do you have a phone that will do that?  (something my old Nokia did years ago)
3. Rep, Just a minute I'll check.  (5 minutes pass)  Yes sir, we do have a phone that will do that.  It's the AT&T something-or-other.
4. Me, Are you sure?
5. Rep, Just a minute.  (5 minutes pass)  Yes sir.  I checked with my supervisor and the AT&T something-or-other will do that.
6. Me,  OK, I'll take it.
7. 3 days later phone arrives.  Follow instructions for charging and activating simm chip.
8. Plug phone into computer to synchronize calendar and contacts.  Nothing.  Phone sits there.  Computer says, "What's this?"
9. Take the whole thing to local AT&T store and am told phone won't do that, I'll have to buy a smart phone and pay $15 monthly data package.
10. Pissed, I send the phone back and cancel upgrade.
11. Go back home and move new simm chip into old phone, connect to computer to download and sync calendar and contacts.
12. Event deletes half of contacts from computer (of 100 or so, remember, business) and duplicates those that are left on the phone and computer.
13. Takes over an hour to delete duplications, still haven't restored all contacts.

This was a month or so ago.  Last week got "offer" from AT&T on phone that would do everything I wanted.  Stupid me, I gave it a shot.  Same result as above, only this time I did not activate the new simm chip so was able to keep all of my data.

If it weren't for my wife and I having a "family" plan that adds my phone for only $10 a month, I would have dumped them.

The moral of the story:  Fuck AT&T! 

We Know Boys and Girls Are Different From Birth. Finally... Documented Proof.

Sometimes, a picture really is worth a thousand words.

So You Think You're Smart? Figure this out.

This year we will experience 4 unusual dates.... 1/1/11, 1/11/11, 11/1/11, 11/11/11.

NOW go figure this out....  take the last 2 digits of the year you were born plus the age you will be this year and it WILL EQUAL 111!

Here's something that's got nothing to do with anything except pure talent.  Cagney and Hope.

Crimini, What's Next?

Always mavens for high-fashion and useless pop-culture gadgets, the Japanese are at it again.

Of course many still prefer old-fashioned razzle-dazzle.  Ain't life grand?

Beyond Gauche

This $34 million super-yacht comes with a matching super-car thrown in for free.

The 122ft. yacht, by Swedish boat builder Strand Craft, will cruise at about 60mph and contains a built-in garage for the toy car, an 880hp turbo charged V12 capable of 233mph.  The yacht has only 4 staterooms so the guest list is going to be pretty exclusive.

The boat company says it is only going to build six of them and that 5 people are already interested, all of them in the Middle East.

Remember this every time you fill-up at the gas pump or keep your thermostat a little higher than necessary... because you and I, millions of hungry and homeless, and Mother Earth herself, are paying for it.

Something To Ponder

I went for a walk this morning at Ft. Caroline National Monument.  They have a beautiful nature trail that winds its way through a gorgeous upland forest.  As I was walking and musing about the history of this place, I was struck by one of those moments of clarity;  the true cost of freedom.

The Ft. Caroline area of NE Florida was the first documented European settlement on the North American continent.  It was settled in 1562 by French Huguenots (a Protestant religious sect) who were fleeing religious persecution.  These people were pissed-off, or scared enough, to gather themselves and their families, buy a small boat, sail out across a vast ocean that few men had ever lived to tell about to a land where there was no other European settlement of any kind and virtually nothing known about the natives.

Think about it.  What would it take for you to leave everything and everyone you've ever known and go to a place that was totally unknown where the odds were that you and all of your companions wouldn't even survive the journey there, much less survive once you get there?

At what point would you be willing to risk your life for freedom?

I ask myself that question and the answer is always the same.  I flat don't know. 

I can't imagine what it would take to make me put on a back pack, grab a rifle and set out for a foreign land that I knew nothing about.

But one thing's for sure, as bad as it is, it ain't that bad yet.

(As to the Huguenots, in fact, they all did die as the Spanish settled St. Augustine a couple of years later and proceeded to massacre the whole lot of them.)

WTF? Gun Sales Up After Shooting

Are we a sick nation or what?

A news item from Bloomberg News

After a Glock-wielding gunman killed six people at a Tucson shopping center on Jan. 8, Greg Wolff, the owner of two Arizona gun shops, told his manager to get ready for a stampede of new customers.

Wolff was right. Instead of hurting sales, the massacre had the $499 semi-automatic pistols -- popular with police, sport shooters and gangsters -- flying out the doors of his Glockmeister stores in Mesa and Phoenix.

"We're at double our volume over what we usually do," Wolff said two days after the shooting spree that also left 14 wounded, including Democratic Representative Gabrielle Giffords, who remains in critical condition.

Unfortunately, there seems to be no corresponding surge in sales of the "demon weed" that, according to "knowledgeable officials," was the source of the problem in the first place.

Just remember folks, guns don't kill people, people do.  Right?

Evil, Wicked, Mean and Nasty

This morning dawned a little raw-boned for Baja Georgia. Temperature in the low 40's with a stiff Nor-Easter kicking the wind chill down about ten degrees. But the day dawned bright and clear and it seemed like a good morning to take a drive out to the beach. It's always beautiful at Ft. George Inlet with the waves white-capping and the water the clear blue of the deep Atlantic driven to shore by the wind.

I was cruising, thanking God for the beauty when I crossed the Intra-coastal and saw this.  A chill ran through me.

At first I didn't know what I was seeing, but quickly recognized it as one of the Navy's new stealth, rapid-response pod-rods.  It's big, and mean, and menacing.

Although it was back-lighted by the sun, it's still very difficult to see.  It confuses the eye.  Right out of Star Wars.

War is ugly.

Fortunately, the glory of the day and the Grateful Dead quickly had my head back where it belonged and I was soon in a more peaceful and beautiful place.

Sexual Harrassment How To

Mr. C and the Ole Ball Coach - Steve Spurrier

Watching my Florida State Seminoles defeat Steve Spurrier’s U of South Carolina Gamecocks the other night reminded me of my up close and personal encounter with the Ole Ball Coach.

Few American sports figures draw the ire or admiration of fans as much as Steve Spurrier.  Ire for his sideline antics, admiration for his impressive achievements.  Any sports fan reading this already knows the reasons for the ire and admiration, but for those of you who don’t, a quick primer.

Admiration:  Heisman Trophy winner as a senior quarterback at the University of Florida.  Successful, but not stellar, career as an NFL quarterback.  As coach, transformed totally non-existent Duke University football team into a conference champion and national contender.  As coach, transformed dysfunctional U of F football team into a Southeastern Conference dynasty and national champions.  As coach, transformed lowly U of South Carolina football team into conference contender and national prominence.  Respected by friend and foe alike for his genius as a play strategist.

Ire:  Famous for his grimaces, facial expressions and visor throwing during games as well as visually chewing out players, coaches, referees and anyone else within earshot.  Intense is not too intense a word to describe his game demeanor.

My first encounter with Steve came during his senior year in college.  I had just gotten out of the military and took a job as a photographer at a local TV station.  Part of my job was assisting the film crew of the University of Florida’s football highlights program, “The Ray Graves Show.”  As such, I attended all of the games and sometimes traveled with the team.

Although it was Steve’s Heisman Trophy year and he garnered a lot of media attention, I don’t recall a single off-field incident to make him stand out from any other player.  He was just another member of the team and never sought or demanded any special attention that I could tell.

My second encounter was of a different nature altogether.  I was in development at the local Public Broadcasting station and for several years produced fund raising programs centered on University of Florida, Florida State University, and University of Georgia football.  They were pre-season shows and basically featured interviews with coaches and players, analysis of the upcoming season, and the past season’s highlights reel.  Each University had its own evening and the local athletic booster clubs manned the phones, taking donations from fans supporting their team.  It was a lot of fun and raised considerable funds for public television.

The U of F football program had gone through some hard times and Steve Spurrier was hired as head football coach and savior of the Gator Nation’s self-respect.  Especially since, at the time, that girl’s school over in Tallahassee was beating them like whipped cream on a regular basis.

The biggest highlight of my programs, and for me personally, was my interview with the head coach, where we would go into depth about the team’s prospects for the coming year.  (BTW  Those coaches included Bobby Bowden and Vince Dooley, a couple of names you might have heard of.)  Well, for weeks my calls for an appointment with Steve went unanswered.  Media days at the universities had come and gone, interviews were in the can and air time was only a week or so away.  It looked like we were going to have to do the show without Spurrier, a great disappointment and a definite blow to Gator Night.

Then, one afternoon I was at my desk when the phone rang.  I picked it up.  The voice on the other end said, “Charleston, this is Steve Spurrier.  I’m sorry it’s taken so long for me to get back to you.  I’ve been totally swamped.”  “Listen,” he continued.  “I’m going to be in town this Saturday to meet with the boosters, can we do the interview then?”

It was like manna from heaven.  Hell yes we can do the interview then.  Spurrier was coming to town and we would do the interview in the studio, on the football set.  What could be better!

On the day of the shoot, at exactly the appointed time, the studio’s front door buzzer sounded and it was Steve.  By himself.  No retinue.  No driver.  I went down, let him in, introduced myself and thanked him for coming.

We spent the next hour on the set in relaxed conversation about Gator football, his hopes and expectations.  Half anticipating a fire-breathing, irascible dragon, I was taken aback by his forthright and unassuming manner.   Several times during the interview, sensing my lack of depth, he would elaborate, in yeoman’s language, so that the subject would be as easily understood and viewer friendly as possible.  It was, by far, the best interview I ever conducted and was edited into a thirty minute segment that had the Gator faithful ringing the phones off the hook.

The rest is history, but I will add a couple of things you might not know.  At the time, Spurrier’s  Heisman Trophy was the only one displayed at the university and not in the winning athlete’s home.  One of the first things he did as head coach was to un-retire his jersey and he replaced the artificial turf on the field with real grass.  What a relief.  That rug was so hot the Gators actually used it as a weapon against their rivals who were unprepared for half-time intravenous hydration, something Spurrier thought was way over the top.

Me too.

This One's For You, Girls

The Japanese are amazing.  How do they think this stuff up?

I wonder what would happen if I put these things in my pants? This might not be such a bad idea after all.